The Other Side of Social Media

I like to think I’m a pretty independent-minded person. I’ve been making an effort to form my own opinions. Mob mentality is often a influential force in someone’s life, and most of the time we don’t even notice how much it affects us. The modern world is relentlessly fast paced, forcing us to process and accept information rapidly. This endless stream of content helps us categorize people into groups, sacrificing their individuality for the common opinion of the group. I’m well aware of this fact, but I still find myself following mainstream thinking. Most of the time, I realize it when it’s too late to undo any harm I may have caused.

The most recent example of this phenomenon in my life was my reactions to recent cases of public humiliation at LHS. I’m used to seeing celebrities or politicians scrutinized by news media but I don’t consciously give them a second thought because it doesn’t affect me. For example, the recent controversy around Jordyn Woods’ alleged affair with Tristan Thompson led me to take the offensive side immediately, and it took me a couple days to sympathize with Woods. “Callout culture” has become such a big part of the media that I’ve been desensitized to how these exposeés affect the people accused, and has made me unaware of the toxic habits I have while reading them. That all came to a head when people at LHS started publicly shaming each other. When I heard about the scandals that students at my school were involved in, my reaction was different. Suddenly, because everyone involved were people that I knew, the callout was much more relevant in my life. My instinct was to react with anger, and that’s the perspective I shared when people talked about the incidents. I thought that because these people were people I knew, I should be more angry at them, and the general response seemed to confirm that I was right. I didn’t consider the other side of the story because I didn’t think anything could validate what they did. This was the exact same impulsive reaction I had with Jordyn Woods, and again, it took me days to look at the other side of the story.

It wasn’t until I had a conversation with my friend that I recognized my toxic thinking habits. I was ranting to him about how frustrated I was about the recent events when he asked: did you even think about why they were exposed in the first place? I tried to think of a comeback but couldn’t find one, because I did not think about why they were exposed in the first place. He continued, explaining that there’s always another side to consider and that I shouldn’t jump to conclusions, especially of someone’s character. He was right- I should have considered the other side of the story, no matter what the story was. I shouldn’t have told my friends how awful I thought the person was when I wasn’t even considering their feelings. This was the exact attitude I had failed to employ a public controversy such as Woods’, and I paid the cost in my real life.

The truth is, even if a scandal is justified, the person accused is always a victim. An example of this is Monica Lewinsky, the woman who was publicly humiliated for having an affair with President Bill Clinton. Of course, Lewinsky is at fault for the inappropriate affair, but instead of the blame falling on both parties of the affair or questions being raised on the implications of the power dynamics, most of the blame fell on her in the form of internet harassment and shaming. During her TED talk in 2015, after detailing her nearly fatal emotional battle against the media, she addressed the solution to the prominent shaming culture in the US: “we need to return to a long-held value of compassion compassion and empathy online. We've got a compassion deficit, an empathy crisis”. Compassion and empathy seem to have disappeared from online culture, and victims of public shaming remind us that the lack of these virtues not only feeds a cycle of ignorance, but also catalyze a victim’s mental instability and wellbeing.

Social media doesn’t do a good job of “outing” or “exposing” people fairly. The evidence is generalized, the analysis is mostly speculation, and the article or post dehumanizes the people involved. It’s extremely difficult to be socially aware and form your own opinion, especially when the media is resolved to one perspective. However, it’s everyone’s responsibility to step back from jumping to conclusions and prevent unwarranted shaming of a single person. As a result of investigating more into the Jordyn Woods controversy, I decided not to choose a side to root for like I usually do. The grey area that I’m currently in is inconsistent and unsatisfying at times, but that’s how it should be for public conflicts. It’s a societal duty to treat a potential victim of public humiliation with respect and compassion, no matter what they are accused of.   

by HANNAH KIM