Lunch at LHS: A Treacherous Routine
With constantly evolving COVID protocols, lunch at LHS this year is different than any year before. Many changes have been made to the lunch system, and although necessary, many students have expressed concerns about the new system.
“I heard that when winter comes around, they’re going to assign each student a square to sit on in the hallway during lunch since we can’t eat outside in the snow,” said Julia Arnold, a senior at LHS. “Mr. Stephens was talking with a teacher about making an Absolute Silence rule, in which no one can talk during winter lunches since their spit will spread COVID indoors. It sounds kind of sad.” It is speculated that the penalty for not following the “Absolute Silence” rule will be having one’s lunch square moved in front of one of the bathrooms.
Some have concerns about the current system. Specifically, about the Choosi system that has been in place for a few years, but exploded in popularity after the pandemic began.
“I think they’re overworking the cafeteria workers,” said Anna Kozlova, also a senior. “Every time I order a sandwich, I order it with lettuce, chicken, turkey, American cheese, pesto, and banana peppers. And every time, when I open my lunch I get two pieces of bread with a tomato in the middle. Maybe they just keep running out of chicken or something?”
“You know what annoys me the most?” said Jessica Yang, a junior, when asked about the Choosi conflicts. “Not that they keep putting shredded paper in my salad, but that the cereal options they provide for breakfast all taste like pencil shavings. I heard Mr. Baker talking about how they need to transition to cereal that tastes like paper shaving instead, because that’s slightly less damaging to students’ taste buds. Honestly, I would agree; the paper in my salad doesn’t taste bad, it just doesn’t have taste.”
On another note, a large percentage of students have complained about the school’s need for an exterminator.
“I mean, seriously, those wasps are everywhere lately during lunch,” said Grace Wang, a senior. “Did you know they’re carnivorous? They literally ate one of my friends the other day. It’s kind of unsafe.”
The administration declined to comment on the wasp issue when asked. Their silence has sparked a buzz of conspiracies amongst LHS students concerning the explosive increase in wasp presence around the school, including: the The Administration is Eavesdropping on Our Lunch Conversations with Wasp-Shaped Cameras theory, the The Administration is Trying to get All Students Eaten by Wasps because They Find High Schoolers Annoying and Moody theory, and, the most popular, the The Wasps are actually Students who were Sentenced to Detention in a Wasp’s Body theory. Though all probable, none have been confirmed as of yet.
by HALEY CREIGHTON